Friday, February 15, 2008

I Hate Bath Time

How to describe bath time? Bath time is where my wife and I try to get the kids to get clean, generally by immersion in water. No big whoop, right? I swear it is like pulling teeth to get them to fully cooperate. The seven year old is pretty good but she will not take a bath by herself. Someone else has to be in the bath room. The four year old is good with getting in the bath but then he tries to empty the bath tub by splashing all the water out onto the floor. The two year old can't take a bath with the other two because she has some weird skin wart virus that is contagious. Crap...how hard is it to just get clean. I ask my friends, "how is bath time at you house" and I get the Betty Crocker "its all good" answer and it just frustrates me to tears. Am I that abnormal or is there something wrong with my kids? Maybe there is something wrong with me? Maybe it is just normal to expect kids to do as they are asked to do then them do the total opposite...who knows.

OK...we got the bath done after my wife and I silently argue over who is going to actually make sure they are clean. Tonight I won, she bathed the kids, but I am probably going to pay later. Anyway that is a discussion for another time. The kids are clean but wet. I tell my seven year old to get out of the tub, dry off (with the towel), go the pajama drawer, get out her pajamas, put her pajamas on, then go to bed. Specifics are key here. If you forget to spell it out then they simply just won't do a certain step. Most of the time she comes into the room with her hair soaking wet and little wet puddles are showing thru her pajamas. She forget step two and skipped to step five. After everyone is out of the tub is where...Bill Cosby said it best..."LET THE BEATINGS BEGIN". Why is it just so hard to put your comfy pajamas on and go to bed?

Let me describe it for you...the baths are done, specific instructions are issued, the kids and mom and dad are exhausted, we issue the edict that says "ok everyone lets head up to bed". The four year old and two year old immediately go to crying, the seven year old immediately starts jockeying for her favorite book to be read and then starts crying herself after mom and dad says, "we are too tired to read tonight'. Why is it just so dang hard for them to say, "that bath was so comforting father, thank you, I am ready to get in my soft comfortable bed and go to sleep because I am just exhausted". NO...they would rather complain, cry, or pitch a fit to stay up and watch some stupid mind numbing cartoon.

I just do not understand these kids. I guess I am too far gone from childhood to remember the fear of the dark. That absolute feeling of terror to be alone in my bed. I sense that strongly from my seven year old. What can you do with this tough? I spend many minutes discussing with her that there is just no such things as monsters, at least the kind she is afraid of. I don't have any idea why the four and two year old children just burst into tears...seriously...what is that all about. I am a lost ball in high weeds over this. Peace...I am searching for peace with my family. I love them so much and have no reason not to enjoy them.

How is a thing valuable? Something is usually valuable because of the effort, either in time or money, that is invested in it. There is nothing more expensive in time or money as is a child. Now I am not saying this is the only thing that makes a child valuable. They are priceless. I am simply saying that common sense would dictate that parents would at least seek to enjoy something we put as much effort in as a child. I struggle to enjoy my children. Like I said I will love them to my death but am I enjoying them? I have to force myself to seek out those times, usually when I am alone with just one child, to truly see what God intended for me to see in my kids. I don't know exactly what I see at those special times but I know that I see the love I have for them reflected in their eyes for me. I don't want the Waltons here I just want to be able to think of my children not as a burden but as the gift that they were and are intended to be.

1 comment:

Hear Me Roar said...

Bath time...I'm not going to fluff this up...it's hell at our house! I have to agree with him on this subject! however, I too would love to see that change. I can remember as a child playing with my sister in the bathtub. We would do all the funny hairstyles, bubble beards, and just laugh. Afterwords, daddy would dit us down in front of him and spend 20 minutes drying and combing our long blonde hair. He would stroke our hair and for that time we new he was enjoying being our caregiver.

Even monkeys groom each other without complaining. Why can't we just get past the job of bathing the kids or the fact they are making puddles on the clean floor, or that they have to be scrubbed from head to toe. A good ole soaking in the tub does just as well.

After the bath why can't we just snuggle and smell that sweet clean scent and enjoy feeling their little bodies give in to a busy day and let them drift off to sleep in our laps. Again, my dad carried me to bed countless nights. Some times i had really fallen asleep but nothing was better than faking it and feeling the love as he carried me to bed and kissed my forehead thinking i was unaware of that kind of love being shown to me.

We are obviously putting too much pressure on ourselves. Is it the bath itself, is it the kids from too long of a day, is it what we are dealing with during the day that is sapping our energy at night. What is it. Whatever it is we need to squash it and enjoy this precious and all too short time in our childrens lives when we are given the luxury of shaping the last moments before they close their eyes and drift to sleep and their subconscious state.

Lord help us love and cherish every moment!!!